I know the feeling. I'm an attractive girl and the thought does go through my head. I'm recently diagnosed and really unsure about the whole dating front. One of the biggest issues I have is, how could I ever ask someone to take a chance that I'm not sure I myself would have been willing to take before I got herpes? I mean, I tell myself the risks are so low, it's not that big of a deal, yet...here I've got it and I've been there, I know it was a miserable primary ob...it is a big deal, how could I ask someone else to go through that?
But at the same time, I think part of my healing process is well...dating. I signed up for positivesingles.com a week or so ago. I signed up for a month and figured I'd see how it went. No expectations.
I had my first date this past week. I didn't feel like there was really any chemistry, so I didn't opt for a second date, but it was a date and it makes me feel pseudo-normal. I am dating. I know that I'm not restricted to dating sites like this, but for the time being, I think that's what I'm comfortable with.
Anyhow, I think if anything HSV has made me more picky. I used to be more willing to have some fun, just settle, see where things went, etc. Now I've got to admit it's a screening process. I know that if I'm going to put myself out there and the time comes that I need to tell someone, that person better be damn worth it.
I don't want to say that my options are limited, but I'm picky and I'm not willing to settle. If I'm going to be with anyone there will be fireworks and unfortunately, they'll have to be accepting. At this point it is what it is.
"What do you do? You laugh. I'm not saying I don't cry but in between I laugh and I realize how silly it is to take anything too seriously. Plus, I look forward to a good cry. It feels pretty good."
- Garden State
The first person w/o HSV that I date and tell is going to be unbelievably incredible, period. He may say no, he's not willing to take the risk, it may hurt like hell, but you know what? It will be his choice, because I didn't get that choice.
Now is there a possibility I might be some spinster auntie...absolutely, but you know I'm with you on that...I will be a damn cool one!